Saturday, May 23, 2009

Multi-day - day three

I got up at 5 with the alarm, late for me. I considered going back to sleep. “Why am I doing this?,” was my thought. Thoughts of what I had seen at the monastery yesterday crossed my mind. Then my ACIM (A Course in Miracles) lesson crossed my mind: The Name of God is my inheritance. The word “inheritance” sunk a little into my conscious awareness. God is all I need. I needn’t be afraid. I am safe in God; where it is true that money and health don’t matter. I needn’t judge. I need only return to my Name of God practice. The practice is to say the name of God frequently to myself and be oblivious to everything else.

I woke up without aches or pains from running. On Wednesday evening I had walked 8 miles. Thursday, I had gone 28 miles and on Friday 22. Now, it is Saturday and I have no time constraints. After an hour of spiritual study, I lifted weights and got my provisions ready for the run. I got started at 7. It was about 60F. I started running and started my name of God practice. I noticed that I would breathe in God and out Self. I recognized that it has taken me more than a day to accept the ACIM teaching that the Name of God is Self because they have the same Name. A father gives his son his name; so God has given His Son His Name. The Self is the Christ and has That Name. We are Christ. But, I have been slow to use it, saying love or peace instead. Finally today, whatever barrier my ego had erected was gone. As I used the word Self, felt drawn in. All things were one and the physical bodies became illusions, the meaningless veils our egos made. I was not a self. I was part of Self and Self was everything with God as everything.

In the park, I saw someone tipped over the trash and I was able to see it was an illusion. I was able to resist judging and resist the attraction of guilt. I remembered that I saw what I wanted to see. I thought more about the monastery and was able to not judge; able to accept responsibility for my projection, my attraction to guilt and give it up to Self. Then joining God/Self as part of Mind, not a body.

During the third lap, I noticed the third toe on the left was hurting. I had looked at it before starting and decided not to do anything for it because it was already a goner and didn’t seem to be in pain. However, now, it was starting to whine. My first thought was, oh, its not that bad. Then I thought, ultra-marathoners pay attention and do something immediately. So I decided to be wise, run the 4 blocks home and put the Compeed on it. This helped a lot; saving not only this run but the rest of the multi-day.

I spent alot of the run listening to my inner procurement department state its case for going to the city this afternoon and satisfying it's desires at the sporting goods store.

The run (at ultra-marathon pace walk/jog) lasted over 5 hours and 23 miles. It finished in 83F heat. So far the multi-day is up to 79 miles. Over the course of today’s run I ate a peanut butter and honey sandwich cut in 3 pieces, 4 Gu packets, one electrolyte S-cap, and 3 Succeed drink packets with 90 oz of water. Next to the dumped over trash was a discarded Crown Royal bag (which explains the trash situation I guess) and I salvaged it. I haven't drank any alcohol for over 23 years and never drank Crown Royal. The words "Crown Royal" and the purple and gold sack remind me more of Jesus than anything. It reminded me of ultra-sobriety and my current definition of continuous conscious contact. Then, I thought of a way to make a neat spiritual ultra-sobriety gift using that Crown Royal bag. (The first person from the Parkhill group who contacts me gets the gift. Hint: push the comment button located below.)

There were many small planes flying about as there is a fly-in at the Amelia Earhart airport. At one point, I was watching two ultra-lights and a helicopter flying together, and thinking that I shouldn’t spend too much time looking up, when I noticed movement at my feet. Startled, I looked down to see a huge bullfrog hop across the road in front of me. What is the symbol or meaning of the bull frog? (see below) I saw a bewildered deer which wanted to escape south but kept crashing into the government fence. I also saw a big black snake lying on the road as I tip toed around it. I saw the black birds chase a hawk. I saw into myself and there was nothing there.

During the 11th lap, I finally “got there.” I came to the top of a ridge, hot sun, no wind, silence, stillness, reduced to a shuffle; I knew it was a moment for which I had begun this multi-day. It took three days to get me to the indescribable place of “knowing.” And….I’m not done yet!

My walking this afternoon will probably first involve pushing a lawn mower, then perhaps a relaxing speed on the TM while I listen to the radio (a little walking will actually help my recovery). But first, a nap. The procurement department is closed. The responsible adult department will probably get it's way and force me to mow the lawn (the laundry is already in the dryer!). But, the take care of yourself department got first dibs. I made a green smoothie, then a salad; and the nap is next.

ps: Frog Symbolism: Sensitivity, regeneration, renewal. In many cultures, frogs are a strong symbol of luck and wealth. Frog medicine teaches the power of transforming oneself, a natural path of change that occurs over a lifetime. Frog is also a symbol of femininity and fertility, and natural healing. Frog people tend to be pleasant, positive, and well in-tune with the energies around them. ...The snake is the symbol of life throwing off the past and continuing to live. The deer (particularly the doe, females) has the capacity for infinite generosity. Their heart rhythms pulse in soft waves of kindness. For the two-legged beside whom Red Tail Hawk flies, a sharp mind will be evident, and these souls will possess the ability to perceive the subtlest of nuances that might escape other less "observant" individuals. (obviouly, I could have pasted in any number of things for these animals)

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