If you do not think you know God, perhaps you do know "...the attraction of God..." (ACIM). Have you experienced the Call, the Yearning, the Wishing for Something Greater than your puny a$$ existence? I have experienced this intense Wishing I Knew God; yes, yes. This Desire is in charge of my life.
Pause. Stop right now and allow THE EXPERIENCE of the attraction of God to wash over you, around you, through you and right into your heart. When I do this, my very being wiggles and wags and shivers in the onslaught of Love; which is God's attracting me to Him. He wants me more than I am capable of realizing. No I am not illuminated; but I am called by God and the attraction of God is what I experience. The experience in and of itself is divine. Experience the Experience without limits, beyond illumination; allow it. That is all: just allow and you will know everything.
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