Saturday, June 25, 2011

What was said...

...while I ran and had to remember later.

This morning, I ran a one mile loop at a place called The Sanctuary. It is a tiny place of nature. I ran 21 miles; 1.5 hours in a gentle rain. Thunder boomed overhead, but it was not a serious storm and I decided to defy it and keep running. It is a magic thing, long distance running is. I maybe don't feel like I can run 5 hours at the start. I only think it. But, as the day wears on, it materializes one lap at a time. I just keep going.

Then, I was laying on the bed this afternoon, pondering my quest for my soul. The most wisdom I seem to have is: I don't know. There is no glory in it. When in doubt be silent and wait. At least I'm not destroying myself by watching TV and eating cake. I wish....I ask....

At last, trying to resolve the inner issue, Nature repeats what it said this morning:
Lap after lap, I watched the turtle dig its way into the mud.
An egg fell from a nest in a tree.
The deer were nibbling grass, and then ran away.
The squirrel did not budge from the branch on which it was sitting.
An occasional flower and brilliant green trees and grass.
Lots of water in the water fall.
A pretty little blue bird.
The runner kept running.

From my position on my bed, I thought to myself, "Doing nothing, being nothing, is a very difficult thing. Seeking my soul, I seem to achieve nothing."

And again, a soulful reply, "only love could have wondered about the turtle, or been sad about the egg, or noticed how delicate the young deer was."

And so I know that all is within me and looks out from me. There is no other place for it to be. I am it and it is me. We are that consciousness and there is no other.

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