...again resolved today: I will pursue the spiritual path to where ever it leads me. Being a spiritual athlete is true. I accept my path. Fitness is part of self transcendence and, hence, part of the spiritual path.
My waffling around of late has had more to do with work. Work is part of the path; but where is the line between spiritual work and ego work? Where do I make my stand? Where do I say, "I am afraid of letting the bosses see I am not totally committed to this company," and must give time and energy to running and prayer. And so I face my fear: if I am not committed, will I get laid off?
And so I come to my soul with the fear, consciously. And so I let spirituality be the foundation and everything else is for spiritual growth. Material world losses can lead to spiritual growth as much as material world promotions. It all takes discernment: what is my soul saying to me? Surrender to my soul is what makes possible the idea that all is for spirituality.
And then I must return to my decision. I choose spirituality despite my ego's qualms and fears and attempts to seek security in the material world. No, I want spiritual connection more.
My weekly rolling mileage total is 63 miles. I went to see my LMT on Monday, so my legs feel great right now. New shoes also help. I am thinking about this weekend and the opportunity to run. I am thinking about my upcoming personal multi-day, which starts next Thursday for 5 days. My personal multi-days are also my personal self transcendence race. I am still working with The Zone diet and learning to plan meals which are exact ratios of protein/carb.
Check out the 3,100 Mile Self Transcendence blog by Uptal: