I am an engineer. I am an ex-nun who maintains a contemplative outlook on secular life. I am an outstanding example of physical fitness. These are examples of areas where I seem to be a leader.
I love the word "leadership." Leadership connects synapses in a way that I become eager. I've spent a week (since starting this blog) wondering why?
I can look it up in a book. I can watch videos from our corporate executives. But if the seed isn't in my heart, I can't be it.
A leader is something you are. It is something you can learn more about and get better at; grow. But what you are really doing is a process of becoming and being. As the process progresses, what I am becoming must feed my soul. If my soul isn't nourished, it won't work.
Speaking of my soul, while I was out running this morning, I was thinking about what it means to live life on a spiritual basis. I keep searching inward, to partner and join that essence, that energy, that inner being. I love that inner being. The seed of leadership and the essence of my soul may be one and the same thing.
I've been reading Aristotle. It confuses the heck out of me, but that is exactly why I read it. As I concentrate on trying to figure out a meaning, I am connecting synapses which haven't been used before. I am using more of my brain and mind. I've also been reading some essays by Paul Brunton. For whatever reason, I needed Mr Brunton to validate my solitary journey. I needed someone to agree that you can progress spiritually without a guru or by following any particular sect. It is sort of a duh moment: if God is a higher power, then he is perfectly capable of contacting anyone open to the contact. I was so convinced by churches and books by "masters" that I couldn't go it alone. But going it alone is my style. Accepting my solitary journey is part of my recovery from monasticism and Catholicism.
I like inner workouts more than outer ones. I feel much better about myself when I listen only to the inner and not to what others think or say I should do.