Friday, March 15, 2013


People advise me to look for the similarities not the differences. To do that is to disregard my true desire to not be like them.

This morning, I ran 4 miles in faster than 5 mph speed. I'm spending my mental power on logistics for a 50 mile race next weekend. Meanwhile, my boss lays in a hospital bed for at least another 6 days after "extensive" colon and stomach surgery. Another 2 colleagues in the immediate work group have physical problems and take medication. And I spend my energy on 2 hours of workout daily.

No, I don't want to relate or be one of. Weekly, I stand in a meeting and keep quiet as the group says the Lord's Prayer together. I cannot say that prayer as its current meaning is not what Jesus meant.

The new pope has displayed a simplicity of life for which I strive. But when it comes to the ongoing practice of privileging priests, I think nothing will change. I continue to with hold my support from such an institution.

I don't: watch TV, drink, go to church, have a family, go to movies, have a fb page, have a mortgage, eat meat, etc. These are all material world things, but they point to my radical existential difference. I don't want to join the dying crowd. I'd rather be a part of the transcendence.

I have had a difficult time with my attitude this week. Today, I started studying A Course in Miracles text for the 9th time. I had no inkling of self crumminess or soul failure today.

I will walk the path of solitude alone because this is what I can support with my moral fiber.

No comments: