Today’s ACIM Workbook Lesson: "I have invented the world I see." The explanation is that what I see out there is my own projection. When I close my eyes, my imagination is no different in its illusive nature than the projection I see out there. It is all the same. As I ponder this teaching, my inner and my outer are the same, I have to wonder about some other way. The other way is the quiet constant light of Christ, forever resting in the Mind of God.
Running long distances is quiet constant sameness; but the thrill of racing is perhaps not. Going to work is constant sameness; but the thrill of business achievement is perhaps not. I create events in my life and distractions in order to avoid quiet constant sameness. Even in the convent, we invented distractions from Silence.
2009 is my 50th anniversary of life. Wouldn't it be cool to hire a coach and really do well in a marathon? Yeah...but like many small towners, coaches for grey haired lady marathoners are non-existent. But, I am in really good shape right now. If we don't get too much snow, I'll be ready for a spring marathon. I weighed 127 this morning (I'm 5’ 8”). I can work on maintaining that.
But underlying my racing dreams is the energy of the athlete. The athlete is always pushing at whatever level they are at. It is this energy which I want to quit corrupting and disrespecting with lapses in concentration which ruin the athletic achievement. Like, you stick to your diet and training, then feeling better, you eat a bag of cookies; then feeling worse, you hate yourself; then get back on the road. I want to honor and live my athletic energy at the elite athlete level. By athlete, I include body, mind and spirit. The greatest athletes have great focus.
My life’s dream has been to transcend through the athlete’s energy. Is this purely the ego’s dream of perfection? I think it is more like finding and living my soul. I can feel my soul now. I can be my soul now. The reason I run, work the 12 Steps of AA, and study A Course in Miracles is because I transcend through these practices. It is through these systems that I achieve my soul’s consciousness. Gosh darn, how many of us wish we could get rid of our shortcomings? Well, I can, using these methods. Little by little, my ego gets smaller and Christ gets bigger.
So I woke up at 4:30, having slept an hour longer than usual. After some spiritual work, I did a set of abdominals and then rode the bike on the back porch. Then I did another set of abdominals and a few shoulder weights. I'm still leaving my elbow alone, only a week since surgery. I was supposed to be off today, but I went to a meeting at 7:30 to see what is up. My boss did say he would cover some things for me. I got done with work by 8:30 and went running. How nice: 10 miles, 27F, sunny, no wind, hardly any cars. A bowl of kale for lunch and all is right with the world.
[ps: what amazes me about this blog is that it is the blog of an ordinary person; not a spiritual giant or anything. I dare to post even though I have no great revelation to share. Just another day in Kansas!]