Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Who Cares for Me

Miracle Principle no 7: "Miracles are everyone's right, but purification is necessary first."

Text 5.VII: " Do you really believe you can plan for your safety and joy better than He can? You need be neither careful nor careless; you need merely cast your cares upon Him because He careth for you. You are His care because He loves you. His Voice reminds you always that all hope is yours because of His care.... Why should you listen to the endless insane calls you think are made upon you, when you can know the Voice for God is in you? God commended His Spirit to you, and asks that you commend yours to Him. He wills to keep it in perfect peace, because you are of one mind and spirit with Him."

My realization this morning: EVERY morning as I sit down to A Course in Miracles and begin to study, I read something and hear the ego's voice telling me what a failure I am at spirituality. Every morning, I start out with the idea I'm a failure. Starting with spirituality, the blood letting extends to everything in my life: diet, fitness, career, relationships, etc.

THIS morning, the pattern became clear and I decided it must be wrong. Jesus would not be saying that. Then I went and rode my nordic track for 35 minutes. Then, I put on layers of clothes, strapped the Garmin on top and went out for a run. This thought came: "I am loved and cared for. I am free." And that became my running phrase, my one thought, the decision and power for me today. I am under the care of God; the safest place in eternity.

I run on hills during the week. Since getting the Garmin and since my last half marathon, I've been working on bringing up my normal pace. Today I hit it: an average of 10 minute miles. I kept marveling: in less than a month, I'll be 52 years old. I work out at least 2 hours a day (and hold down a job). I'm doing great.

I need God to keep me from hating myself every morning. I need God to come with me thru the day. I totally understand how if I am cared for by God, I don't need to be afraid of such things as layoffs at work. I have no family or husband, so I must rely on God.
Yesterday, I ordered a new piece of exercise equipment. Time to shift my core and strengthening to keep improving. this morning, I was investigating to do my calorie counting. I think I'll try that for awhile. I was happy to see that most of the food I eat is already in their data base.

Christmas at Ultra Monk's house (so far): airplane tickets to Vancouver for May, TRX exerciser, Garmin 305, 2 calendars.

I'm going in a half marathon on Sunday. Trial number two in my quest for a 1:50.

2011: the year of high performance.

Dang I am happy. It must be my decision to let God be in charge.

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