Pre-54 Reflections

This morning, I pondered A Course in Miracles chapter 31.

Text 31.VI:

You see the flesh or recognize the spirit. There is no compromise between the two. If one is real the other must be false, for what is real denies its opposite. There is no choice in vision but this one. What you decide in this determines all you see and think is real and hold as true. On this one choice does all your world depend, for here have you established what you are, as flesh or spirit in your own belief. If you choose flesh, you never will escape the body as your own reality, for you have chosen that you want it so. But choose the spirit, and all Heaven bends to touch your eyes and bless your holy sight, that you may see the world of flesh no more except to heal and comfort and to bless.

And then, while riding my stationary bike, I pondered Miracle principle 33:

Miracles honor you because you are lovable. They dispel illusions about yourself and perceive the light in you. They thus atone for your errors by freeing you from your nightmares. By releasing your mind from the imprisonment of your illusions, they restore your sanity.

A Course in Miracles often asks that I be silent and listen. I'll hear the Voice for God. This freedom is what I like about the Course. It is mainly giving tools for freedom. Chapter 31 is the last chapter. It means that by my birthday on Saturday, I'll have read the text 8 times.

All I know is I do have far fewer inner turmoil periods and much more inner peace.

On the eve of my birthday, I am doing a 5.4 cross training event. That is, I'll go to each of 5 cross training stations in my house for 20 min plus Turkish Get-ups with Windmill will be the 0.4. In between each station, I'll do a set on the TRX for a total of 54 reps. Cross training stations are: bike, elliptical, step platform/kettle balls, Versa Climber and Nordic Track.

Then on Saturday and Sunday, I'll do my usual miles. If I feel good on Saturday and the weather is ok, I'll try for 26. Then I could do 13 on Sunday and call it a reverse Goofy.

Some people lay around eating and drinking on their birthdays. I'm exactly the opposite.

Lately, I've been getting in more than 2 hours of workout per day (split before work and after work). I get excited about this. I feel a big race growing inside me. Maybe the Prairie Spirit 50 mile race in March will be it. My left heel will always have problems, but it is not bothering me too much right at the moment.

Entitlement

I used to have a lot to say on this blog. But since moving to Texas, I have less to say. This seems to me because I don't need to promote anything about myself. That is, I seem to have gotten over my need for approval from any church or monastic order. I know my spiritual program works for me; but that most people wouldn't agree that it is a valid theology. So, I seem to have forgotten my soap box about spirituality or contemplation. Doesn't mean that God is not constantly on my mind.

Why is Mitt Romney a candidate for president? Well, I saw a picture of him for the first time today (ummm....yeah I don't watch tv). IMO, he's just another pretty face. Bet Barak has a nicer ass. But, I'm not registered to vote and don't vote.

1% has the money and the tax loopholes. 47% are victims. I'm part of everyone else who actually pays the taxes. Anytime the government wants money, they come to us. Doesn't matter who exactly is elected.

I saw a picture of nuns from my former convent sitting around talking about the Church's "Year of the Spirit." Really? Someone needs to make such a proclamation? What about every year? But, mostly as I looked at the picture, I realized how much I don't belong locked in a monastic life. No I really don't want to ever be in another encounter group.

It has been several years since I had a deep meaningful conversation with anyone. If something comes up in my life, I just think about it and then decide. I don't ask advice or opinions. I discuss work issues with colleagues, but that is about it.

 I have a sense of entitlement. I am entitled to at least 50 miles and 20 hours of exercise a week. I just had a 4 day weekend. My Seabrook training camp included 76 miles plus 3 hours of non-running cross training plus 100 sit-ups a day and 2 other strength sessions. Whew, I was tired.

But I still got up at 3:15 this morning, did my hour of spiritual work and the 75 minutes of cross training before getting to work at 6:30.

 I really really liked the 50 mile race I did on September 1st. It caused me to consider that perhaps I am an ultra-sprinter since I really don't see the point of destroying my body as a 100 mile run does. That said, I am signed up for Ultracentric for 48 hours in the hopes of trying to get 100 miles.

I signed up for a 50 mile race next year (and bought the airplane tickets to get there):

This weekend, when I was working out, I kept meditating on this (from Chapter 21 of ACIM):
Happiness is constant, unshakeable.
If I want it because it is the thruth
that God constantly loves His Son.

As I meditated, I conceded that there'd have to be a God. Also, we are His Son and He loves us. Anything else is not real.