Sunday, April 29, 2012

Frisco 50 - I am an Ultra Runner

It is Sunday morning. I am in an airport. I just walked back and forth along the concourse for 2.5 miles. Last night, I sat in a hotel room and looked at my second place medal from the 50k (31 miles) I ran. It is a symbol of something.

I am an ultra runner again. I will say, for me, there is something more to a 31 mile race than a 26.2 mile race.

My trip to Kansas City has caused me to realize: I don't care about Kansas City. I am a person without a commitment to a place or a tribe. This is the result of my Course in Miracles studies. Yes, I walk about the world, but I am not really attuned to it. I know it is a dream. I see my own charade being carried out and I don't need to judge anyone else's charade.

I met interesting people at the 50k race: Mr Florida, Ms Ithaca, Miss Ft Worth, Rob...

Running in the last few miles, I did realize that this race was showing me what I am made of. I was beyond what training could do. I was just being guttish. My legs hurt but it seemed not to matter.

The aid stations were out of water. The finish line was out of finisher's medals. A deer fly bit me enough to draw blood. I got the last diet coke.

Being from Houston, the humidity was my friend.

I had one thought on my mind: The gift of Christ is all I seek today. This phrase is from A Course in Miracles. I mention that because many Christians would not agree with the premises of the Course. But while I was running a 50k, there was a young man running a half marathon. I saw him at the start with a large wooden cross. At about 6 miles, I was passing someone, and another person in a shorter race was coming back at me (meaning 3 of us across a 10 ft wide trail). Just then, the man with the cross came from behind and passed me. I didn't hear him. I said, "Sorry." He quickly adjusted the cross to keep from hitting me and said, "that's ok."

Watching him run forward, I thought about all the things people do for religion and in this case Jesus. I mean, I did spend 4 years in a monastery and know the shenanigans the nuns pull. Then I realized: the problem with Christianity is that everyone has their own belief about Jesus.

Now in the airport, I hear there is a scandal in the Roman Catholic church related to nuns. Really?

I had lunch with an old friend during this trip. I feel bored with the conversation. Walking back and forth in the airport, I realize that Kansas City is not special to me. I lived here 25 years, but there is nothing there for me now.

Back in Houston. DOMs is setting in. I must keep moving.

1 comment:

Rob Horton said...

Kudos on the bonus hardware, and thanks for sharing the stirrings of your heart. Excited to hear about your 24 hour adventure.