Saturday, November 27, 2010

Holiday Retreat - Day 8

I have been off work and alone for 8 days. My recovery from the world is going well.

Personal Statistics:
Saturday - 80 minutes on ex-machines and a 10 mile run plus a strength workout.
Sunday - 13.1 mile race plus 65 min of jogging for warm up and cool down plus a 59 minute walk.
Monday - 120 min on ex-machines plus 6 mile jog plus a strength workout.
Tuesday - 60 min on ex machines, 10.8 mile run and 41 min walk.
Wednesday - 18.9 miles run plus strength workout.
Thursday - 4 hours on ex-machines, 4 mile run and strength workout.
Friday - 3h41 min trail run.
Saturday - 15 mile walk plus strength workout plus 60 min on ex-machines.
Sunday - ________ TBD.

Pondering:
  • I made my list of Right Answers (see below). I need this list of non-ego thoughts so that when I am in trouble, I have something true to hang onto. And the list is a way to keep from letting my mind go wherever it wants.
  • I realize that the founders of A Course in Miracles and the more well known teachers seem not to have achieved "it." Yet I believe that I can learn from Jesus and escape from ego prison. I am committed to the Course as my spiritual path.
  • I seek quiet and solitude because I need to hear something besides the yammering of the ego in the world. "Be still and know God" is a perfectly clear approach.
  • I spent Friday running the trails with this in my head: Into Thy hands I commend my spirit. I pondered the giving up of the ego and total reliance on God. Late at night, I felt that I had a moment of clarity: I have accepted God's peace. I am willing to let The Holy Spirit care for me. Yes God I accept Your peace. I said this and meant it. I accepted the power of peace instead of the ego grandiosity.
  • Today, walking, I look at the future. The company plans to lay off 600 people. Will I be one? It doesn't matter. I rely on The Holy Spirit.
  • Today marks the third day of absolutely no human interaction. I see how different my mind is when there is no one else around to posture before. I am a simple truth without the ego's presence.
  • I thought about applying for a job in Germany; but it would mean tons of world wide travel. I accept that solitude is my way or I would have corrected that in the past year instead of going further into solitude. So, I won't apply for the job. I'll wait and see what The Holy Spirit has for me here.
List of Right Answers:
There is no ego. Hate does not exist.
If I am afraid, I am deceived.
Fear is lack of love. Atonement heals.
Love alone is my reality.
In the holy instant I forgive.
And miracles come forth as love expressed.

The Holy Spirit is the Voice for God.
I hear Him speak quietly in my mind.
I am not alone. Jesus is here.
Jesus is the undoing of the dream.

God is not symbolic. He is fact.
His peace cannot be shaken. I am free.
The innocent always truly see.
Christ vision is their one and only sight.
Into God's Hands I commend my spirit.
And so my mind awakens to His peace.

This is my commitment and the Truth.
Love is my intention as of now.

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