Thursday, January 7, 2010

Unknown Reasons

This post will not contain any words of inspiration. This post is a mundane collection of doings and thoughts.

Yesterday, I got up at the usual time, 3:51, and did my spiritual study. I am in chapter 30 of A Course in Miracles text. I was reading the part about the rules for decision making; which basically says to make all decisions with Jesus and if you are uncomforatble at all, its because you made a decision by yourself and judged whatever is happening based on your little ego.

So, a big snow storm was on the way but not here yet. I went out running on roads which were bare from the last storm and mostly empty of cars at 5 am. So I got in a nice run which was actual running not treadmill running (which is very different than actual running).

I had my work laptop and a pile of papers at home, with no intention of going to work, even though the roads were bare for the morning commute. But I was called to go to 6:30 am Mass yesterday. When I say call, I mean I had some inner urging to go. I don't know why I go. It is not for any reasons the church would come up with.

After Mass, I came home, set up my work laptop and got to work. It didn't start snowing until about noon. I quit work at 4:40 pm. Then I switched to my personal laptop and worked on my ACIM project. It is a project I devised. I listed the 50 miracle principles in an excel spreadsheet. Then, I am going thru the text (Word version) and pasting every miracle reference into the excel spreadsheet next to the miracle principle which seem to match that reference. I am learning about miracles as I do this. I will need to ponder everything once I get it all pasted together and probably move things around as well as come up with a clever formatting scheme. I will also add reflections which I might get from my own listening to the Voice for God.

I realized I am dedicated to the Course in Miracles. Since I have read the text almost 5 times and the work book twice, I am in position to say that no one can ever take the course from me. Also, no one can stop me from doing it. I am free. I don't need a church, a priest, a sacrament (I am the Sacrament), a building, a teacher (other than Jesus), no tithing, no ceremony, no promotions, no committees. I am free to study and practice and learn. I am free to have days according to Jesus. I am free.

Yesterday evening, I did a weight workout and some more treadmill time. By the time the snow stopped, we had 5 new inches on top of about 8 old inches. This much snow is very unusual. I got up again this morning at 3:51 for spiritual study. I jumped on the treadmill at 4:45. Out the window, I watched guys in pickup trucks pushing snow around. I watched the bobcat clear in front of my garage door. At 6, I came to work.

Weird stuff:
  • What are the metaphysical and spiritual implications of treadmill running?
  • I am the dreamer of the dream. What is my dream of snow for considering metaphysics?
  • I am doomed to daily dieting and calorie watching for life. Imagine how that shapes me as a person. Why do I want that (metaphysically I mean)?
  • In a few days, I will be 51. I can't imagine I've been alive that long. I am healthier than ever. Furthermoe, the zen core exercises I have been doing have been paying off. My abdomen is rock hard and ripped.

Last night, before going to sleep, I sat quietly and listened with spiritual ears. I didn't hear anything except a somewhat wordless gratitude within myself that I take time for that. I sensed the environment of love, the ocean of love, in which I live.

I do not know what anything means. Now, I am going to continue working on the information for the phenyladol process hazard analysis.

ACIM text 30.III:

"...Nothing that God knows not exists. And what He knows exists forever, changelessly. For thoughts endure as long as does the mind that thought of them. And in the Mind of God there is no ending, nor a time in which His Thoughts were absent or could suffer change. Thoughts are not born and cannot die. They share the attributes of their creator, nor have they a separate life apart from his. The thoughts you think are in your mind, as you are in the Mind Which thought of you. And so there are no separate parts in what exists within God's Mind. It is forever one, eternally united and at peace.

Thoughts seem to come and go. Yet all this means is that you are sometimes aware of them, and sometimes not. An unremembered thought is born again to you when it returns to your awareness. Yet it did not die when you forgot it. It was always there, but you were unaware of it. The Thought God holds of you is perfectly unchanged by your forgetting. It will always be exactly as it was before the time when you forgot, and will be just the same when you remember. And it is the same within the interval when you forgot.

The Thoughts of God are far beyond all change, and shine forever. They await not birth. They wait for welcome and remembering. The Thought God holds of you is like a star, unchangeable in an eternal sky. So high in Heaven is it set that those outside of Heaven know not it is there. Yet still and white and lovely will it shine through all eternity. There was no time it was not there; no instant when its light grew dimmer or less perfect ever was.

Who knows the Father knows this light, for He is the eternal sky that holds it safe, forever lifted up and anchored sure. Its perfect purity does not depend on whether it is seen on earth or not. The sky embraces it and softly holds it in its perfect place, which is as far from earth as earth from Heaven. It is not the distance nor the time that keeps this star invisible to earth. But those who seek for idols cannot know the star is there...."

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