Friday, January 11, 2019

The Difference

There is a difference between real life and romanticized life. I am only now realizing that all books I've read romanticize life. YouTube romanticizes life. I am living real life.

It is the eve of my 60th birthday. Who ever thought a person could be 60? I remember when I was 39 and wondered if it was okay for 39 year old ladies to climb rocks in Death Valley. Well, now I am 60 and still doing what I think 60 years olds shouldn't be able to do.

I got up at 4 and did my writing and meditation. This was followed by 30 minutes of rowing. Then I got cleaned up and went to work. Starbucks got slammed today. So, I not only did alot of lifting but tons of running around: 3.5 miles inside the store. Lifting? Yeah, buckets of ice, gallons of milk (4 at a time), buckets of cold brew (14 liters), coffee urns, trash bags that weight 20 pounds, getting boxes down off the top shelf, etc. To be honest, I am proud that a 60 year old can do this job.

Then, to the grocery store (like everyone else in KC) because a snow store is coming. Get gasoline. Come home to rest a bit and read. Do some of my own writing. Get on the elliptical for 35 minutes and then 25 minutes of weight lifting and core. Then a bowl of vegetables, rice and beans; topped off with a Vega shake.

Yep, pretty proud of my physical self. What is more important is how I feel on the inside. I am happy on the inside; mainly because Abraham Hicks taught me how to feel happy regardless of what is going on in the material world. See most people think only a loser would work at Starbucks. And why quit a 6 figure engineering job and go work at Starbucks?  Well, it is only a part time job, so I get to see sunshine and walk/run in the park in the sun very regularly. I run alot, and better now than when I lived in Texas; mostly because I am not suffering from heat related illness half the time. And they have hills here. I love hills.

Starbucks is a spiritual tool. With the challenges of the job, I practice happiness. Don't think that washing dishes and shoveling ice is a glamour job. Its not. Taking out the garbage can be very nasty yucky. Strangely, some part of my energy system relishes this job. I get energy in some way, even though I get exhausted in another way. I wonder if sitting in an office doing engineering is somehow bad for the soul; and that is why having a physical job is energizing. It is a luxury to be able to afford to work at a menial job.

What am I like at 60? Pretty proud. Also, appreciative of not only my life, but life itself. Life.period is a 60 year old woman lifting weights even though she did all that lifting at Starbucks. Life.period is spending time in contemplation and writing; a relationship with the inner depths. Life.period is spending the afternoon watching it snow.

At 60, I must still be pretty smart and well respected. The district manager for H&R Block picked me as one of only 5 first year associates to be eligible for a plus status. That is, I had to test up to become eligible for a bonus. I passed the test yesterday.

I have 33 years of sobriety and I am still active, as well as loving, AA. I love being in a fellowship with new people, as well as people I've known for 33 years. Being sober is the thing I am most grateful for in this life. Having a sober adult life is such a blessing. I came back to KC to be with these long time friends; heck, I even have a god mother here. I have sisters; monastic sisters that is. They say they are my family and they invite me home for the holidays.

Here is a picture of me and my sister at Christmas:


I am creative and learning to be a writer. Yes, I have 2 writing projects which I continually plug away at. I find that reading my writing is pretty fascinating.

I have downsized. The Honda van is gone; replaced with a Civic. The townhouse is smaller than what I had in Texas; but it does have a brand new heat pump system.

I have always planned to work in retirement. Retirement only meant I ditched my career so I could do what I want. I am more active, far busier and more social. My engineering job was somehow exhausting. 

So, eat healthy, exercise alot, get outside. Continuously seek Spirit: she is with you always. Amen!

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