Friday, October 4, 2013

Handicapped Life

It has only been 10 days. I have at least 30 more to go. It is my first experience of having one leg out of commission. Most of the time during the day, I am able to use a scooter under that leg and so get around pretty easy. At night, on the second floor of my house, I use crutches (aaaakkkkk! hated).

At this time, almost every activity is a chore. I didn't realize how easy everything is when you have 2 legs. But with one leg, my body is most of the time like a sack of potatoes heaved around by my arms. And my hands are sore from the crutches.

As I sit in bed in the morning, I dread getting up. I miss the endorphins I made as a runner. Am I getting depressed?

Well, this morning, getting up was a chore. Getting a shower was a chore. But very soon, after I got downstairs and began my spiritual study, I had good thoughts.

My answer for everything is to find your essence, the ground of your being. Here, at my source is the meeting place of human consciousness and higher consciousness. And here, I can turn over my human consciousness and accept intuitive thoughts. And then, I feel fine.

Overall, getting my foot fixed is the best idea ever! And even my current disability is still "having it good" in general terms. For instance, I just scooted out to get the mail and felt the sunshine. I have my work computer at home and am being a productive employee. I will even get one of my "Invalid 550" workouts done today. Other people have been helping me.

So, for depression, desire to drink, sloth, any mental barrier; find the ground of my being and let it take over my life. I am here to serve the pattern of life, nothing more. Gratitude is another word for it.

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